Some good hiking jokes are a great way to pass the time while you’re… hiking. Or while you’re just hanging out at home.
We’ve compiled some of our favorite hiking jokes and made up a few of our own to arrive at this list. A little hiking humor can make the trail seem shorter, so don’t be afraid to jot down a few that you like to share with friends later.
Enjoying nature, getting some exercise, and sharing some laughs isn’t a bad way to live in the moment. I hope you enjoy our hiking humor.
Best Hiking Jokes
1.) Guess what I call my hiking playlist featuring songs from Peanuts, The Cranberries, and Eminem?
My Trail Mix!
2.) What did the father say to the son when asked, “How was your hike?”
He said, “It had its ups and downs!” (Boom – first dad joke.)
3.) How do mountain climbers know what the weather is like at the top of a mountain?
They climate. (climb it)
4.) Why did the rocks refuse to play hide-and-seek with the mountains?
They always peak.
5.) Did you hear about the nun who hiked every day?
She was a Roman Catholic. (Roaming Catholic)
6.) Why do hipsters prefer backcountry river trails for hiking?
Because they are less mainstream.
7.) What’s the difference between a hiker and a backpacker?
Hikers carry their food, while backpackers carry their kitchens.
8.) Where did the hikers stop for lunch?
At the fork in the trail.
9.) Getting to the top is optional. Getting down is mandatory.
10.) What’s the opposite of hiking?
See our Inspirational Hiking Quotes page.
Funny Hiking Jokes
11.) Why can you never run in a campground?
You can only “ran” because it’s always past tents.
12.) Hiking and happiness go hand in hand or foot in boot.
13.) My most memorable hikes can be classified as ‘Shortcuts that Backfired’.
14.) Son: Dad, what do we do if it rains while we hike?
Dad: We get wet.
15.) What did the techie call poking the fire with a stick?
Changing the channel.
Funny Hiker One-Liners
16.) You are not almost there!
17.) Just another Half Mile or So.
18.) “I’ll Be There in a Minute” Hiking Group.
19.) Something’s wrong! The trail looked so flat on the map.
20.) I chose the road less traveled, and now I don’t know where I am.
21.) It’s all fun and games until you hear a twig snap behind you.
22.) Sleeping bags are the soft tacos of the bear world.
23.) Never hike alone in a bear country. Always hike with someone you can trip and outrun.
24.) Netflix and chill? More like Trailmix and Hill.
25.) Think outside. No box is required.
26.) Husband: What is your walking team name, dear?
Wife: We’re deciding between Legs Miserable and Cirque du Sore Legs, but Red Hot Chili Steppers isn’t out of the running.
27.) What was the most difficult decision the walking team needed to make?
Choosing between a walk and a hard pace.
28.) My daughter could hike all day, but my son always wants to stop forest.
29.) After a son told his father he wanted to start training for cross-country, what did the dad say?
“It’s best you start with a small country.”
30.) Did you hear about the two peanuts walking down the street?
One was assaulted.
31.) Why was the walker considered so even-tempered?
She took everything in stride.
32.) How did the walker describe the 20-mile hike?
Like fun, only different!
33.) Why was the walking group considered so smart?
They called themselves the Road Scholars.
Hiking Jokes From Comedians
34.) I wouldn’t hike to escape the Nazis.
35.) I went on a hike with a comedian. It was a very flat hike… I’m not trying to be better than anyone.
36.) Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.
37.) There’s clothing for walking outside. I thought all clothing was for walking outside.
38.) Because hiking is not exercise, it’s the segue between the actual exercise you did in your twenties and thirties and then the gentle mall walking that you’re going to do in your seventies and eighties.
39.) The first thing you notice when you go hiking is that it’s a mistake.
40.) My doctor told me I should run five miles a day for exercise. I called him after two weeks and said, ‘Doc, I’m 70 miles from home!’
Trekking and Backpacking Jokes
41.) Mountains aren’t just funny; they’re hill areas!
42.) What mountain is always quiet?
43.) Fact: Hiking is actually just walking, only on dirt or rocks or other uneven surfaces. Or walking where an animal larger than you can kill and eat you.
44.) Be nice to hikers. They know areas where you can’t be found.
45.) Apparently, I camp now.
46.) Turtle Hiking Crew: We will get there when we get there.
47.) I have to say summiting was fun, but it’s all downhill after that.
48.) What kind of jacket did the trekker wear on the hike?
49.) Did you hear the one about plateaus?
They say their the highest form of flattery.
50.) I’m not going to lie; missed-stakes were made.
51.) What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear.
52.) What was the trekker’s favorite movie?
Monty Python and the Holy Trail.
53.) Why did the bicycle decide to skip the hike at summer camp?
It was two tired.
Well, I don’t know about you, but it seems like many of these hiking jokes have gone downhill. Still, I hope you enjoyed at least some of them.
By Mike O’Halloran
Mike is the founder and editor of Sports Feel Good Stories. He has written four books on sports.
You are on our Best Hiking Jokes page.
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