Take a dive into our pool of swimming jokes and let the laughter flow.
If you prefer just a quick dip, review the first section on the best swimming jokes. And if you want to make a full splash, just scroll down and read them all. I hope you enjoy them.
Best Swimming Jokes
- What kind of race is never run?
A swimming race. - Where do ghosts like to go swimming?
Lake Eerie. - What did Cinderella wear on her feet while swimming?
Glass flippers. - How do pirates measure the distance they swim?
In Yarrrrrrrrrds. - Where do zombies like to go swimming?
The Dead Sea. - Did you hear about the slow swimmer?
He could only do the crawl. - Why don’t fish play piano?
Because you can’t tune a fish. - What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing. It just waved. - Why did the teacher jump into the water?
To test the water. - Why did the cantaloupe jump into the pool?
It wanted to be a watermelon.
Good Swim Jokes
- Why would the boy only do the backstroke?
He just had lunch and didn’t want to swim on a full stomach. - Why did the teacher jump into the pool?
She wanted to test the water. - Why did the vegetarians stop swimming?
They didn’t like meets. - Why did the swim coach refuse to play hide-and-seek?
Because good swimmers are hard to find. - What kind of exercise is best for a swimmer?
Pool-ups. - Why did the swimmer go back in time?
Because he was doing the backstroke. - What do a dentist and a swim coach have in common?
They both use drills. - What is a polar bear’s favorite stroke?
Blubber-fly! - What word looks the same backward and upside down?
Swims.
Funny Swimming Jokes
- What kind of dive are infantrymen best at?
Cannonball! - What do you call a swimming pool full of blondes?
Frosted Flakes. - What kind of swimmer makes a good gardener?
One with great seed times! - How do people swimming in the ocean say Hi to each other?
They wave! - What was the swim team’s favorite sandwich?
Submarine sandwiches. - Where does Santa swim?
The North Pool!
Hilarious Swimming Puns
- I only laugh at swimming puns.
I’m not a fan of dry humor. - What’s a shark’s favorite sci-fi show?
Shark Trek. - My sister and I are saving up together to pay for swimming lessons.
We’re pooling our resources. - What do scuba divers wear to bed?
A snore-kel. - What does a search engine wear in the water?
Swimming googles. - Where do fish keep their money?
In river-banks. - Is swimming easy or hard?
It deep-ends. - What’s a swimmer’s favorite type of music?
Poolka. - What kind of stroke can you use on toast?
Butter-fly. - What kind of exercise is best for a swimmer?
Pool-ups.
Swimming Play on Words
- What do you get when you cross a pool and have a birthday?
A splashing good time. - Why wasn’t the pumpkin allowed to swim?
There was no life-gourd on duty. - What do swimmers say when they enter the pool?
Water you waiting for. - What do you call an underwater pool party?
A pool-ooza. - What do you call a swim team made up of girls named Jennifer?
Hydrogens! - Why did the girl have problems swimming?
She didn’t have buoyancy! - What detergent do swimmers use to wash their wet suits?
Tide!
Animal Swim Humor
- What’s a sheep’s favorite swimming stroke?
The baaaackstroke. - What do elephants wear in the pool?
Swimming trunks. - What is a polar bear’s favorite stroke?
Blubber-fly. - Why are spiders so good at swimming?
Because they have webbed feet. - In what direction does a chicken swim?
Cluck-wise. - What do you call a goat that can swim really fast?
A motor goat! - What do you call a small pole that can swim?
A tadpole! - Why was the mouse afraid of swimming?
Catfish! - What swimming race was held with two dogs?
Dog paddle.
Animal Swimming Jokes
- Which insect is the best swimmer?
The butterfly. - Why did the fish blush?
It saw the ocean’s bottom. - What do you call a fish who keeps everything to himself?
Shellfish. - What was the fish’s favorite TV game show?
Whale of Fortune. - How did the fish get back to his friend?
On a shell phone. - How do fish clean themselves?
They wash up on shore.
Swimming One-liners
- Last night, I dreamt I was swimming in orange soda. It was just a Fanta sea!
- Someone asked for a donation towards the local swimming pool. So I gave them a glass of water!
- Seven days without swimming makes one weak.
- To the infinity pool and beyond.
- Classical musicians favor the Bach stroke.
- We were mermaid for each other.
- I had to give up scuba diving as a hobby after I hit rock bottom.
- It’s time to make a splash.
- Seas the day.
- When in doubt, swim it out.
- Swimmers try to avoid dark chocolate because, according to studies, it lowers the chances of a stroke.
- This summer is going swimmingly.
- The heart patient was reluctant to swim lessons as they were concerned about his strokes.
- I prefer swimming in salt water because I’m sensitive to pepper.
Swimming Instagram Captions
- Girls just wanna have sun.
- Happy as a clam.
- Born to swim.
- A little fish in the big sea.
- Keep calm and swim on.
- Floating on sunshine!
- I’ve gone off the deep end.
- The pool is calling.
- Oxygen is overrated.
- In the pool, life is cool.
- Poolside is my best side.
- Life is better in the pool.
- Summer is going swimmingly.
- Dive in.
Time to hit the pool! Have fun with these swimming jokes.
By Mike O’Halloran
Founder and Editor, Sports Feel Good Stories
Overtime
You are on our Best Swimming Jokes page.
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