Great sports jokes can be a fun way to entertain and amuse a team, parents, and fans.
Check out all of our sports jokes, puns, dad jokes, and one-liners that you can choose from to entertain friends and family.
Remember, the key is not just selecting a funny joke, but a large part of the charm is how you deliver it. So, take some time, and as in sports – practice, practice, and practice. Enjoy!
What’s the difference between time and a ball hog?
Did you hear about Team USA Men’s Team?
10 men, 1 dream, and 19 eyebrows.
What does a Bulls fan do after watching his team win?
Rewind the tape.
What do you say when you miss a basket?
Why can’t basketball players go on vacation?
Because that would be traveling.
Why doesn’t Albany have a professional basketball team?
Because then New York City would want one too.
What do you call a failed Alley Oop?
A: An Alley Oops!
What do you do when you see a lion with a basketball?
Get out of the way.
Why did the ball hog fail his chemistry test?
He didn’t like to pass.
Did you hear the Atlanta Hawks don’t have a website?
They can’t string three W’s together.
Why are basketball players messy eaters?
They’re always dribbling.
Why did the basketball player sit on the sideline and sketch pictures of chickens?
He was learning how to draw fowls.
What violation do ghosts get called for the most in basketball?
What is the difference between a Suns fan and a baby?
The baby will stop whining after a while.
See our complete page full of Basketball jokes.
Football Jokes and One-Liners
Why doesn’t Toledo have a professional football team?
Because then, Cincinnati would want one.
What’s the difference between a New England Patriots fan and a carp?
One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is a fish.
How do you keep the NY Giants out of your front yard?
Put up goalposts.
Q: What’s the difference between the Dallas Cowboys and a dollar bill?
A: You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
Q: What happened to the joke that Carson Wentz told his receivers?
It went over their heads.
What does a Minnesota Vikings fan do when his team has won the Super Bowl?
He turns off the PlayStation 3.
What do you call a genius sitting in the Texas A&M student section?
What do you call 20 Vikings fans in the basement?
A Whine Cellar.
What do the Atlanta Falcons and possums have in common?
Both play dead at home and get squashed on the road!
What’s the difference between the New York Jets and a dollar bill?
You get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
See our complete page of Football jokes.
Funniest Hockey Jokes
I went to a hockey store and asked an employee if they had any cheap skates.
They sent me to the manager’s office.
Hockey players are like goldfish…
The way we get their attention is to tap on the glass.
How are hockey players paid?
Why do Canadians always beat Germans at hockey?
Canadians bring their ‘eh’ game; Germans bring their wurst.
Why don’t ice hockey players tell jokes?
The ice might crack up.
I watched hockey before it was cool.
They basically were swimming.
I wanted to buy a hockey stadium.
But unfortunately, my realtor could only give me a ballpark estimate.
What was the hockey player’s favorite John Denver song?
Hockey Mountain High.
Pickleball Jokes and Puns
My neighbor told me his dog retrieved a pickleball two miles from the nearest courts.
I had to use my glasses while playing pickleball.
It’s a no-contact sport.
I’m okay with my pickleball doubles partner poaching my shots, but we were in a bar.
Why was the pickleball association’s website down?
They had problems with their server.
What do you call a woman standing in the middle of a pickleball court?
I recently returned from a friend’s funeral. He died from being hit with a pickleball to his head.
It was a powerful service.
How many pickleball players does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. Because pickleball players say, “Out? What do you mean ‘Out!’ It was in.”
Volleyball Jokes and Riddles
How did the volleyball player like her eggs?
What do you call it when a player returns the ball with arms up at the net while falling?
A stumbling block.
What did the team call it when Stephen King raised his arms up at the net to stop an opponent’s spike attempt?
What was the volleyball team’s favorite TV show?
How I Set Your Mother.
What boy band group was noted for their great volleyball skills?
New Kids on the Block.
Why did the volleyball player continue to play professionally?
She wanted to strike it rich.
What classic movie did the volleyball team watch repeatedly?
See our page devoted to Volleyball Jokes, Puns, and One-Liners.
When to use sports jokes?
There are several occasions where a good sports joke might come in handy. A coach could use a humorous story or a joke to lighten the mood after a tough loss or before a big game. A sports banquet or team party is another opportunity to have some fun. The key point is to read your audience – will they appreciate the humor, or is the timing bad?
For youth sports, never tell an inappropriate joke with politically incorrect humor.
Simple jokes seem to work the best. The more complex a joke becomes, the more quickly you can lose an audience.
If you’re involved with a sports team, it’s fun at practice to invite players to share their favorite jokes. Set some ground rules, e.g., clean jokes you could tell your grandmother. And give the players some advance notice so that they can prepare.
Even if the jokes are not all that good, they can still boost spirits.
How to tell a sports joke?
There are a lot of elements that go into good joke-telling. For one, you need to be confident. Even if the joke is great, a poor joketeller can ruin it. Confidence comes with practice. Rehearse your joke or tell it to others for practice.
When telling the joke, don’t be afraid to stretch it out a bit. Pauses work well with humor. Deliver your punch line with zest, and let your audience laugh. You won’t need to.
Some of the best jokes are told at the right time. When dealing with humor, it generally helps to not take yourself too seriously. Self-effacing humor works well with audiences of all ages. Never single out an individual unless you’re 100% positive; they’ll love the joke.
Here are some more practical tips for joke-telling.
By Mike O’Halloran
Mike is the founder and editor of Sports Feel Good Stories.
You are on our Sports Jokes page.
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